"Weird Al" Yankovic

Contents:
  1. Ricky
  2. Gotta Boogie
  3. I Love Rocky Road
  4. Buckingham Blues
  5. Happy Birthday
  6. Stop Draggin' My Car Around
  7. My Bologna
  8. The Check's in the Mail
  9. Another One Rides the Bus
  10. I'll Be Mellow When I'm Dead
  11. Such a Groovy Guy
  12. Mr. Frump in the Iron Lung

Ricky

(parody of "Mickey" by Toni Basil)

Hey Lucy, I'm home!
Oh, Ricky, you're so fine,
You're so fine you blow my mind.
Hey, Ricky! Hey, Ricky!
Oh, Lucy, you're so fine,
You're so fine you blow my mind.
Hey, Lucy! Hey, Lucy!
Oh, Ricky, you're so fine,
You play your bongos all the time.
Hey, Ricky! Hey, Ricky!
Oh, Lucy, you're so fine,
How I love to hear you whine. Hey, Lucy.

Hey, Ricky!
You always play your conga drums.
You think you got the right.
You wake up little Ricky
In the middle of the night.
Stop shakin' your maracas now,
And just turn out the light, Ricky.

I'm sick of Fred and Ethel
Always comin' over here,
'Cause Fred eats all our pretzel sticks
And then he spills his beer.
Why don't you serve your casserole
And make them disappear, Lucy?

Oh, Ricky,
What's a girl like me supposed to do?
You really drive me wild
When you sing your Ba-ba-lu.
Oh, Lucy, you're so dizzy,
Don't you have a clue?
Well, here's to you, Lucy.
I love you too, Lucy, too, Lucy.
Let's Ba-ba-lu, Lucy.

Hey, Ricky!
You're always playin' at the club,
You never let me go.
I'm beggin' and I'm pleadin',
But you always tell me no.
Oh please, honey, please.
Let me be in your show, Ricky. Waaa...

You always burn the roast,
And you drop the dishes too.
You iron my new shirt,
And you burn a hole right through.
You're such a crazy redhead,
I just don't know what to do, Lucy.

Oh, Ricky,
What a pity, don't you understand
That every day's a rerun,
And the laughter's always canned.
Oh, Lucy,
I'm the Latin leader of the band.
So here's to you, Lucy,
Let's Ba-ba-lu, Lucy, do, Lucy...everybody rumba!

Huh huh huh huh huh huh huh huh

Gotta Boogie

Gotta boogie.
Gotta boogie.
Gotta boogie.
Gotta boogie.
I gotta boogie!
(Gotta boogie)
I gotta boogie!
(Gotta boogie)
I gotta boogie!
(Gotta boogie)
Gotta boogie on my finger,
And I can't shake it off!

Well, I went out to a party
Just the other night.
I was jammin' to the music,
I was feelin' all right.
I was burnin' up the floor,
Like a disco maniac,
When my woman said,
"Baby, why's your hand behind your back?"

Gotta boogie!
(Gotta boogie)
I said boogie!
(Gotta boogie)
I gotta boogie!
(Gotta boogie)
Gotta boogie on my finger,
And I can't shake it off!

I can't pick it off!
(Oh no)
I can't flick it off!
(Oh no)
I sure ain't gonna lick it off!
(Oh no)
So I guess I'm gonna have to learn to
Live with it.

I gotta boogie!
(Gotta boogie, uh huh, he gotta boogie)
Gotta boogie!
(Gotta boogie, uh huh, he gotta boogie)
Gotta boogie!
(Gotta boogie, uh huh, he gotta boogie)
Gotta boogie on my finger,
And I can't shake it off!

(Boogie!)
Gotta boogie.
(Boogie!)
Hey, you wanna boogie?
(No, man, I don't want a boogie!)
Wanna boogie?
(Get that boogie outta my face!)
Do any of you wanna boogie?
(No!!!)

Gotta boogie on my finger,
Gotta boogie on my finger,
Gotta boogie on my finger,
And I can't shake it off!

I Love Rocky Road

(parody of "I Love Rock 'n Roll" by Joan Jett & The Blackhearts)

I hear those Ice cream bells and I start to drool,
Keep a couple Quarts in my locker at school
Yeah, but chocolates gettin old,
Vanilla just leaves me cold,
There's just one flavor good enough for me, yeah me,
Don't gimme no crummy taste spoon, I know what I need, baby

I love Rocky Road,
So won't you go and buy a half gallon baby
I love rocky Road,
So have another triple scoop with me, OW!

They tell me ice cream junkies are all the same,
all the soda jerkers know my name,
When their supply is gone,
then I'll be movin' on
But I'll be back on Monday afternoon,
You'll see, another truckloads comin' in for me,
All for me, I'm singin'

I love Rocky Road,
So won't you go and buy a half gallon baby
I love Rocky Road,
So have another triple scoop with me, OW!

Oh, make it talk.

When I'm all alone,
I just grab my self a cone,
And if i get fat and lose my teeth that's fine with me,
Just lock me in the freezer and throw away the key, singin',

I love Rocky Road,
So won't you go and buy a half gallon baby
I love Rocky Road,
So have another triple scoop with

I love Rocky Road,
So won't you go and buy a half gallon baby
I love rocky Road,
So have another triple scoop with

I love Rocky Road,
So won't you go and buy a half gallon baby
I love Rocky Road,
So have another triple scoop with

I love Rocky Road,
So won't you go and buy a half gallon baby
I love Rocky Road,
So have another triple scoop with me!

Buckingham Blues

(originally a parody of "Jack & Diane" by John Cougar Mellencamp, but changed into an original for the record)

Gonna tell you a story
About Chuck and Diane.
Couple British kids from
The palace at Buckingham.
Chuckie wants to grow up
And be a polo star,
And ride his little horsies
All around the backyard, oh yeah.
You know they really paid their dues.
I said hey, lawdy mama.
They got them Buckingham blues.

Now Chuckie goes hunting,
And leaves Diane alone.
So she fixes her hair,
And she talks on the Princess Phone.
Chuckie's still tryin' to figure out
What his job's supposed to be,
And Diane's the fashion leader
Of the aristocracy.
I said hey, Lady Di,
Tell me where'd you get them shoes? Ah,
Well hey nonny nonny,
Looks like you got them Buckingham blues.

Aw, bein' heir to the throne, well
It must be awful hard.
Gotta pose for pictures
Out on the front yard.
And Lady Di, well,
She must have it pretty rough.
Gotta hang around the house all day,
Makin' babies and stuff.
Another game of croquet,
Then they're off on a Caribbean cruise.
Well hey bop-a-re-bop,
They really got them Buckingham blues.

Ah, tell the truth, now, tell the truth - Wow!

Ah got my mojo workin'! Yeh! Wooh! Don't help me now.
Ah, hurt me mama. Whoah! Ahhhhhh-!

They don't serve no Twinkies
With their afternoon tea.
Never had a dinner
Made by Chef Boy-ar-Dee.
Bein' in the spotlight
Is a hard life to choose.
Diane drops half a pound,
It's on the six o'clock news. Ah yeah,
Those kids have really paid their dues.
Aw, what a royal pain it is,
When you got them Buckingham blues.

Happy Birthday

Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday to you!

Well it's time to celebrate your birthday,
It happens every year.
We'll eat a lot of broccoli, and drink a lot of beer.
You should be good and happy that there's somethin' you can eat.
A million people every day are starvin' in the street.
Your daddy's in the gutter with the wretched and the poor.
Your mama's in the kitchen with a can of Cycle Four.
There's garbage in the water,
There's poison in the sky.
I guess it won't be long before we're all gonna die!

Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday to you!

Well, what's the matter, little friend, you think this party is the pits?
Enjoy it while you can.
We'll soon be blown to bits!
The monkeys in the Pentagon are gonna cook our goose.
Their finger's on the button, all they need is an excuse.
It doesn't take a military genius to see
We'll all be Crispy Critters after World War III.
There's nowhere you can run to,
Nowhere you can hide.
When they drop the big one,
We all get fried.

Come on, boys and girls, sing along, okay?

Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday to you!

Well, there's a punk in the alley, and he's lookin' for a fight.
There's an Arab on the corner buyin' everything in sight.
There's a mother in the ghetto with another mouth to feed.
Seems that everywhere you look today, there's misery and greed.
I guess you know the Earth is gonna crash into the sun,
But that's no reason why we shouldn't have a little fun.
So if you think it's scary, if it's more than you can take,
Just blow out the candles,
And have a piece of cake.

Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday to you!

(wow!)

Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday to you!
Happy Birthday! Happy Birthday to you!

(Happy Birthday!)

And a pinch to grow an inch!

Stop Draggin' My Car Around

(parody of "Stop Draggin' My Heart Around" by Stevie Nicks with Tom Petty & The Heartbreakers)

Had to park my car for just five minutes.
I had to go inside to use the phone.
When I came back again, my car was gone. Well,
I didn't know it was a loading zone.
What a bummer, I as so brought down.
I had to chase that tow truck a over town, yellin'

Stop draggin' my... Stop draggin' my...
Stop draggin' my car around.

Took my baby to the local disco.
I was jumpin' like a maniac.
But the owner came and pulled me off the floor. Then he,
He took me to his little office in the back.
He said, "I really like your snaggletooth necklace.
Your pants are groovy, and your hair's okay.
But, man, that car of yours is so uncool.
Like wow, I'm sorry, but we towed it away!"

Stop draggin' my... Stop draggin' my...
Stop draggin' my car around!

Now I'm at home. I'm watchin' "Gilligan's Island."
Guess it's time to trade my old car in.
For twenty dollars and my '64 Plymouth,
Maybe I could get a second-hand Schwinn.
Look out the window, there's a
Tow truck in the driveway.
I grabbed the driver and I asked him why.
He said, "I'm sorry, kid, you're late with the payments.
It's time to kiss your little car goodbye."

Stop draggin' my... Stop draggin' my...
Stop draggin' my car around!
Stop draggin' my car around.

Listen, the check's in the mail. No, really!
Stop draggin' my car around!
Oh man, I just had the hub caps painted!
Stop draggin' my car around!
Hey! Hey, I left a sandwich in the back seat!

Stop draggin' my car around. Oh... Stop draggin' my car around.

My Bologna

(parody of "My Sharona" by The Knack)

Oooh, my little hungry one,
Hungry one.
Open up a package of my bologna.
Oooh, I think the toast is done,
The toast is done.
Top it with a little of my bologna.

Never gonna stop,
Eat it up.
Such a tasty snack,
I always eat too much,
And throw up.
But I'll soon be back
For my my my yi yi wooo!
M-M-M-My-yi-yi wooo!
M-M-M-My bologna.

Spreadin' on the mustard now,
A-show me how.
Spread it on a little of this bologna.
Hopin' that we don't run out,
Don't run out.
If we do, I'm sure that I'll miss bologna.

Never gonna stop,
Eat it up.
Such a tasty snack,
I always eat too much,
And throw up.
But I'll soon be back
For my my my yi yi wooo!
M-M-M-My-yi-yi wooo!
M-M-M-My bologna.
M-M-M-My bologna, hey.

<burp>

Goin' to the market now,
Market now.
I'm the city's biggest bologna buyer.
Walkin' down the shopping aisles,
Shopping aisles.
Fillin' up my basket with Oscar Mayer.

Never gonna stop,
Eat it up.
Such a tasty snack,
I always eat too much,
And throw up.
But I'll soon be back
For my my my yi yi wooo!
M-M-M-My-yi-yi wooo!
M-M-M-My bologna.

M-M-M-My bologna. M-M-M-My bologna. M-M-M-My bologna.

The Check's In The Mail

Well, hey, how ya doin'? Have a seat. Have a drink.
Boy, it's good to see ya. What can I say?
Wo, sorry, gotta run. We'll get together again.
Say, what was your name, anyway?
Well, we're workin' on the problem.
We'll get back to ya soon. (yeah)
But don't try to call me.
I'll be in a meeting every afternoon.
For a year. Maybe longer. Keep in touch.
Thanks for droppin' by, and have a nice day.

The check's in the mail. (hey!)
You're beautiful.
Don't ever change.
(You know what I mean)
My girl will call your girl.
We'll talk. We'll do lunch.
Or leave a message on my machine. So baby,
Won't you sign
On the dotted line.
I'm gonna make your dreams come true.
The check's in the mail.
Would I lie to you?

Well, hey. Wait a minute.
Whattsa matter? Hold on.
You want me to fork over the loot?
You say you hate my guts?
You wanna take me to court?
And you got yourself a lawyer with a three-piece suit?
Well, I'm proud to say you're not
The only critic of mine. (yeah)
So if you wanna sue me,
I'm afraid you're gonna have to wait in line.
Take a number. Thanks for calling.
Who loves ya, baby?
Don't forget to read the fine print.

Say, the check's in the mail. (hey!)
You're beautiful.
Don't ever change.
(You know what I mean)
My girl will call your girl.
We'll talk. We'll do lunch.
Or leave a message on my machine. So baby,
Won't you sign
On the dotted line.
I'm gonna make your dreams come true.
The check's in the mail.
Would I lie to you?

Aw, trust me!

The check's in the mail. (hey!)
You're beautiful.
Don't ever change.
(You know what I mean)
Why don't you leave a message with my girl,
Or have lunch with your machine. So baby,
Won't you sign
On the dotted line.
I'm gonna make your dreams come true.
The check's in the mail.
Would I lie to you?

The check's in the mail.
Would I lie to you?

Another One Rides The Bus

(parody of "Another One Bites The Dust" by Queen)

Ridin' in a bus down the boulevard,
And the place was pretty packed.
Couldn't find a seat, so I had to stand,
With the perverts in the back.
It was smellin' like a locker room.
There was junk all over the floor.
We're already packed in like sardines,
But we're stoppin' to pick up more.
Look out!

Another one rides the bus-ah.
Another one rides the bus-ah.
And another comes on,
And another comes on.
Another one rides the bus.
Hey!
He's gonna sit by you.
Another one rides the bus.

There's a suitcase pokin' me in the ribs.
There's an elbow in my ear.
There's a smelly old bum standin' next to me.
Hasn't showered in a year.
Well, I think I'm missin' a contact lens.
I think my wallet's gone.
And I think this bus is stoppin' again,
To let a couple more freaks get on.
Look out!

Another one rides the bus-ah.
Another one rides the bus-ah.
And another comes on.
And another comes on.
Another one rides the bus-ah.
Hey!
He's gonna sit by you.
Another one rides the bus.

(Yeh) Huh ah huh ah huh ah huh ah

Another one rides the bus.
Another one rides the bus-ow!
Another one rides the bus-hey, hey!
Another one rides the bus-hey-y-y-y!

The window doesn't open, and the fan is broke,
And my face is turnin' blue. (ugh)
I haven't been in a crowd like this
Since I went to see The Who.
Well, I should'a got off a couple miles ago,
But I couldn't get to the door.
There isn't any room for me to breathe.
Now we're gonna pick up more, yeah!

Another one rides the bus-ah.
Another one rides the bus-ah.
And another comes on.
And another comes on.
Another one rides the bus-ah.
Hey!
He's gonna sit by you.
Another one rides the bus.

Go! (go) Yeh! (yeh).

I'll Be Mellow When I'm Dead

I don't care about your Karma.
I don't care about what's hip.
No space cadet's gonna tell me what to do.
I won't swim in your jacuzzi.
You can't make me settle down.
I'd rather kick and jump and bite and scratch
And scream until I'm blue.
I may as well be hyper,
As long as I'm still around.
'Cause I'll have lots of time to be laid back,
When I'm six feet under ground.

I'll be mellow when I'm dead.
I'll be mellow when I'm dead.
I'll be mellow when I'm dead.

I'll be mellow when I'm dead.
I'll be mellow when I'm dead.
I'll be mellow when I'm dead.

When are you
Cosmic cowboys
Gonna get it through your head?

I'll be mellow when I'm dead.
I'll be mellow when I'm dead.
I'll be mellow when I'm dead.

I'll be mellow when I'm dead.
I'll be mellow when I'm dead.
I'll be mellow when I'm dead.

I can't stand the smell of incense.
I don't really like to jog.
No Joni Mitchell eight-tracks in my car. (ooh)
I hate anything organic.
Even health food makes me sick.
You won't catch me sipping Perrier
Down in some sushi bar.
I tell you, now's the time to go for
All the gusto you can grab.
You'll have plenty of time to be low-key
When you're laid out on the slab.

I'll be mellow when I'm dead.
I'll be mellow when I'm dead.
I'll be mellow when I'm dead.

I'll be mellow when I'm dead.
I'll be mellow when I'm dead.
I'll be mellow when I'm dead.

When are you
Cosmic cowboys
Gonna get it through your head?

I'll be mellow when I'm dead.
I'll be mellow when I'm dead.
I'll be mellow when I'm dead.

I'll be mellow when I'm dead.
I'll be mellow when I'm dead.
I'll be mellow when i'm dead.

Ow! Bopcat!

I don't want no part of that vegetarian scene.
I won't buy me a pair of designer jeans.
No redwood hot tub to my name.
I got all that I want,
And if it's all the same to you,
I don't need a course in self-awareness
To find out who I am.
And I'd rather have a
Big Mac or a Jumbo Jack
Than all the bean sprouts in Japan!

So don't ask me what I'm into.
I don't need to prove I'm cool.
I'll break your arm,
If you ask me what's my sign.
I won't tell you where my head's at.
I don't need to see no shrink.
Psychosis may be in this year,
But I'm really not that kind,
And I'm in no hurry to be casual.
In fact I think I'll wait
Until I'm pushing up the daisies.
(Like, wow, man, can you relate?)

I'll be mellow when I'm dead,
I'll be mellow when I'm dead,
I'll be mellow when I'm dead.

I'll be mellow when I'm dead,
I'll be mellow when I'm dead,
I'll be mellow when I'm dead.

I'll be mellow when I'm dead,
I'll be mellow when I'm dead,
I'll be mellow when I'm dead.

I'll be mellow when I'm dead.
I'll be mellow when I'm dead.
I'll be mellow when I'm dead.

Such a Groovy Guy

I got my alligator boots. I wear my pants skin tight.
I wear my dark sunglasses in the middle of the night.
And when I look in the mirror, oh it's such an awesome sight.
It makes me want to kneel down and pray.

I'm so adorable and charming.
I'm sure that you can see.
And everybody's always tryin' to hang around with me.
They tell me I'm the greatest, and it's hard to disagree.
'Cause I'm so perfect in every way.

And I'm so cute,
I can hardly stand it.
And I'm so handsome, honey, I could just die.
I know you'll never be as wonderful as me,
But at least you can try. 'Cause

I'm such a groovy guy.
(such a groovy guy)
Yeah, I'm such a groovy guy.
(such a groovy guy)
I'm such a groovy guy.
(such a groovy guy)
Yeah, I'm such a groovy guy.

Baby, are you in the mood for a little romance?
Well, for starters I could pour some chocolate pudding down your pants.
And then attach electrodes to your brain, and watch you dance.
Well, golly, wouldn't that be fun?
Oh, and then I might decide to tie you up with dental floss.
I'll make you wear a harness, and I'll show ya who's the boss.
Of course, if you refuse, well honey, it's your loss.
I mean, I don't do this with just anyone.

So baby, how can you say its all over?
So how can ya tell me goodbye?
So now you tell me that you're leavin' me for good,
And all I wanna know is why?
I mean, after all,

I'm really such a groovy guy.
(such a groovy guy)
Yeah, I'm such a groovy guy.
(such a groovy guy)
I'm such a groovy guy.
(such a groovy guy)
Yeah, I'm such a groovy guy.

I mean you could do worse.

I'm such a groovy guy.
(such a groovy guy)
Yeah, I'm such a groovy guy.
(such a groovy guy)
I'm just such a groovy guy.
(such a groovy guy)
I'm such a groovy guy.

(such a groovy guy) Baby, I tell ya I'm such a groovy guy, I'm
(such a groovy guy) Yeah, I'm such a groovy guy, I'm
(such a groovy guy) Such a groovy guy.
(such a groovy guy) Such a groovy guy, such a groovy guy.
(such a groovy guy) Such a groovy guy.
(such a groovy guy) Such a groovy groovy guy, such a groovy guy.
(such a groovy guy)
(such a groovy guy)
(such a groovy guy)

Mr. Frump In The Iron Lung

I visit Mr. Frump in the hospital.
I see him 'most every day.
And when I see Mr. Frump in his iron lung,
This is what I hear him say:
(iron lung sounds)

Ya know, Mr. Frump is my very best friend.
He's never a chump or a tease.
He never tells me lies, and best of all,
He never disagrees.

I bring him candy and flowers every afternoon.
Sit down by his side and say "Hi".
And then I ask him his opinion of the world situation,
And I wait for Mr. Frump's reply.
And Mr. Frump would say:
(iron lung sounds)

Well, unfortunately, soon it came to be
Mr. Frump's dying day.
So now I bring to you the very last thing
That Mr. Frump had to say:
(rapid iron lung sounds)

A-men!


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